Divine Proportions @ The Vaults Review

An indulgent dinner with Dionysus is always going to be a hard invite to turn down but I really did get lucky – proverbially – when I picked one of the show’s two clothing optional dates in November.


Divine Proportions at The Vaults is an indulgent feast for eyes, ears and, most conventionally, mouths. Apart from a brief slip up which sees my vegan companion unintentionally try fish for the first time in a decade, dinner goes off without a hitch. Guinea fowl and turmeric tinged foams on cardamom jellies maintain the evening’s sense of indulgence.

Topless maenads open proceedings with a word of warning for mortals who are tempted to touch their bare skin, a rule the naked crowd before them are probably more au fait with than the average punter. Enter Dionysus, moustached, Helen White’s performance is a delight. They are not he nor she, but divinely genderless and with the voice of… well… a god. Her order to “clear the table” prompts my human companions to grab for our plates as quick as we can before she leaps up and croons to us all.

Aphrodite shows off floral femininity while her leather-clad alter ego Persephone shows off her badass womanhood in a fiery performance that closes the show. The bacchanalia continues as the now suitably lubricated crowd take to the floor. The balance feels about 70/30 men to women but, as so often happens, the girls and I seem to stay on the dancefloor a little longer.

Keep your eyes peeled for naked events like this. It is a fantastic night, free of gender norms, clothes and shame.

Review written by Harry Davies.

Divine Proportions is currently showing until Saturday 12th January 2019 at The Vaults. To find out more about the production visit here…

Written by Theatrefullstop